2 years on tumblr
A few days ago I received an email from tumblr that I had officially hit 2 years and I was just astounded.! It made me smile and feel nostalgia.
These past 2 years have been some of the hardest and best of my life. It brought many beautiful changes and I feel like it helped me grow stronger and grow up more in general.
This tumblr was an escape for me. My journal. A friend, a confidant. When I was alone in some of the darkest moments of my life, when my belongings were being hacked and ripped apart from me, I kept this journal, this friend hidden. I truly had nobody to turn to.
But then on that fateful day my prayers were answered and the angel of a man I had prayed with my soul, my heart, my very existence through tears and pain had appeared and there began my anguish, la douleur exquise. It is honestly the most beautiful feeling I have ever felt and I would relive it a million times to end up where I am now.
The feelings of first love are something so beautiful that I cannot describe in this one post. But it was what saved me. So cliche I know but its true. This tumblr knows it all. My thoughts, my feelings, from my daydreams, to our encounters, to our first kiss.
You see had I never met someone ever like him. He was mysterious. He was different. To me he seemed other-worldly and he still appears that way. My life went in fast-forward. I was like angel being thrown into the land of Gods and Monsters. I was trying to keep up.
This tumblr is so special to me because it has the story of how I met the most important person of my life. It was clandestine, forbidden, sweet, but bitter and painful.
Words never spoken so true
And I remember when I met him, it was so clear that he was the only one for me. We both knew it, right away…
He was charismatic, magnetic, electric and everybody knew it. When he walked in every woman’s head turned, everyone stood up to talk to him. He was like this hybrid, this mix of a man who couldn’t contain himself. I always got the sense that he became torn between being a good person and missing out on all of the opportunities that life could offer a man as magnificent as him. And in that way, I understood him and I loved him.
I loved him, I loved him, I loved him.
And I still love him. I love him.
-lana del rey
I love him because he’s the only one in their lives to call their bullshit
basically saying what we’re all thinking
"Don’t make me sad, don’t make me cry,
Sometimes love is not enough and the road gets tough
I don’t know why
Keep making me laugh
Let’s go get high
The road is long, we carry on
Try to have fun in the meantime"
me all the time
Me right now
Without him I wouldn’t be strong enough or be able to find that little ray of sunshine in my life right now to guide me through the darkness.
I will never be able to repay him for all the moments of happiness he brings me.